March 27, 2015 PAIN

“Growth Through Pain.”  “No Pain, No Gain.”  Throughout our lives we have all probably heard some version of these sayings.   As I have grown older I have come to disagree with these canards.   I do not view pain, true pain, either physical or emotional, as a vehicle for growth or increased strength.  Meeting and overcoming life’s challenges can indeed lead to personal development and advancement.  Solving a challenging problem at work, getting through a challenging financial episode, embarking on a challenging workout routine, weathering a storm that causes damage – all of these can make a person stronger and help her/him increase self-confidence.

 But “challenges” are not “pain”.  The woman with the migraine is not “in challenge.”  She is “in pain.”  The man with advanced cancer does not have “challenges” racking his body.  The parents who lost their son in a car accident are not “challenged” by the experience; they grieve and are in emotional pain.

Pain serves a very important biological purpose, and is crucial for the survival of the individual and the species.  It is through the avoidance of physical pain that we try to keep our bodies safe and expend effort to prevent injury, and thus we survive to procreate.   We let go of the hot saucepan, we don’t stab ourselves with the knife, we don’t jump off the roof, because we want to avoid pain.  The avoidance of emotional pain is beneficial as well – we take care of our family members because we love them, yes, but we also know how devastating it would be emotionally if harm were to come to them.  So avoiding pain, and learning lessons once the pain has been removed, helps us survive.  But these lessons are learned only after the pain has diminished.  I may learn  that I should not touch a hot saucepan after I have withdrawn my hand and the pain begins to subside, but while it is burning my hand I guarantee that I am not learning lessons – I simply want the pain to stop.  

Unfortunately in life, sometimes the pain cannot be stopped.  The cancer is terminal, the Alzheimer’s progresses, the daughter has died.  We are in pain, in the present, and that pain brings no lessons and no growth   It just hurts.  And no pithy saying from a bumper sticker or motivational poster will ease that pain.  What can we do?  

As Christians, we have a Savior who experienced just this kind of pain.  He was made flesh and suffered terribly during the crucifixion and the events leading up to it.  He became Man and willingly suffered physical and emotional pain not only to forgive our sins, but to be able relate to the pain we experience as humans.  We can lay our pain at His feet, surrender it totally to Him.  When He died on the Cross, He not only invited us to unburden ourselves of our sins in His name, but our pain as well.  When nothing on this Earth can relieve our pain, we can turn to Him and simply say “Please.  Take it.  I surrender it to you.”  And once the pain has been given to Him and spiritually removed, perhaps then we can grow in strength and carry on with life.

Shared by Gary Gerfen